“How does Love really work...something
like this?
I am half a century
old and I guess when you put it that way it seems like a long, long time but
no, really, it was just yesterday. But of one thing I am sure of when I woke up
today is this. I spent my youth looking for a man to be in love with…instead I
should have looked for a man like my father. A man that would be in love with
me. We are born into this being loved then by that love, learning to love. I
watched a silly girly movie with a very cool message and then it hit me. What I
have learned because of a great love that I am in now, but, now I can put this
in words. Words that I hope my children and their children read and learn from.
I hope that you receive the revelation as well and spend your youth with such a
man or woman.
You see it is easy to
be with someone you are in love with…but is he in love with you? Did he love
you the moment he saw you? If he is a man of truth, a man of honesty, of
respect of value then it is safe to say “yes” to all these questions. Look not
for someone that is flashy to your eye or “flashed is all you will get.” But
when someone loves you they don’t blind you with flash, or cash, or stash
people. They are just honestly there. Just like your parents were when you were
born. There you were, bald, with a diaper load, screaming first thing in the
morning and those two people were up and staring into your crib with big cheesy
grins waiting for you to break that first smile, half open that one eye and
give them a big dose of milky morning breath like it was the sweetest rose the
ever smelled and to them, it probably was. That was you first experience of
someone in love WITH YOU.
The first valuable
lesson learned in life was that moment. So why would you want less than that
for yourself later in life? Those two people set the bar high so you would know
what you are worth. I found after many mistakes to apply that rule to my life
now. I woke up one day and said, “If I ever allow myself to love again, this
time I will make sure that I choose a man that loves me like my father does,
like my sons do and I won’t take anything less. If I found such a man, I knew
that I would be able to love him back without loving in vain. I thought that if
I compared all men to them my worries were over, because, of course there was
no such a man. But I was wrong.
One day that man
showed up in my life and nothing that I could do or say was going to change
that because this time, well, he was in love with me. Love came for me and I
was not prepared. Marc was nothing less
than a friend, a close companion, a comfort and persistent. See love just doesn’t
know when to stop loving, so it simply doesn’t. When you get scared and think “this
is just too much I am suffocating. This can’t be real. I want out before I get
hurt”, love just patiently waits till your done panicking and then comforts you
and makes you feel safe. Then before you know it you just fell in love with the
person the loved you first. See, in the end Love always wins the heart it came
for. That is how you know it is real. Everyday isn’t perfect, you will agree,
you will disagree, you will agree to disagree and you will both do this for 100
years. But, that is another attribute of love it is everlasting. You will never
consider separation or a life apart because you just won’t. Love doesn’t just throw
up its hands and leave because you are different. You love each other for these
very reasons, because you are different and because sometimes you are the same.
But if you fall in
love with a King, a King is simply a man at the end of the day… and you can be
in love with this man. However, you can be in love with a man who at the end of
the day is simply a King and you can be in love with him as well. I am in love
with such a man. No we are not rich materialistically, and yes, we agree to
disagree often. But where we are the same is where we keep our treasures. We
keep the memories that we share of our children, his children and my children
and our grandchildren in one place, in the same place in our heart. Because at
the end of the day when we go on to our eternal home that is the only love that
we are taking with us…and that we will. Live in love, that love will live and live
well at the end of the day.
By Ana Fraijo
February 1, 2013
